Adverts – Channeling my inner psychopath

Image: Keep adverts out of the home. The holy Past-time of defenestrating televisions

I don’t dislike adverts, I don’t detest them, I pathologically hate and despise them. Their effect on me is a whole body experience that is a challenge to self control. If you want to see this supposedly grown man seethe, consumed with rage, just add adverts.

Every advert is dishonest, it’s ‘give us your money’ wrapped up in a saccharine coating of bullshit. The more fancy the outlet, the more bullshit, with mainstream media being the worst.

Back in the early 90’s, assaulted by a particularly banal, patronising, bullshit advert, I stabbed and chipped my television screen with a carving knife. Realising we had come to the parting of the ways I heaved it out of my first storey flat window. It’s flight was brief but uneventful, its landing was satisfyingly terminal.

I run an ad blocker in my browser for self protection to preserve my sanity and every web site that gives me a whining demand to ‘white list’ them is exited immediately. If your business model is dependent on adverts, you don’t have a business model, you’re a parasite.

I have less of a problem with local business flyers, it’s the corporates that really do for me. Production costs for making TV adverts can range from around £25,000 for a straightforward TV commercial to £250,000 for a blockbuster TV advert with top stars and a famous music track [1]. And it’s all bollocks!

Adverts rule the waves (not Britannia), air, land and sea and they are all devil spawn.

You get the picture, so there’s an end of it. Hopefully I will get through the rest of my days without committing any major crime against the corporate mind fuckers, but it’s going to be a close run thing.

[1] https://www.toasttv.co.uk/tv-advertising-costs/

Keith Lindsay-Cameron aka Keith Ordinary Guy – the seething. 23 January 2021.

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