A journey begins

Here’s a thought for you. Scientists have worked out that the chances of any one of us being born on earth are 1 in 400 trillion. By way of comparison, the chances of you winning the UK Lottery are, 1 in 45 million.

Allow me to do that long hand…

1 in 400,000 000,000,000


1 in 45,000,000

Let’s be very clear about this, every human being on earth is a winner in a lottery with mind buggering odds against them being born. As far as humans are concerned, it’s the biggest lottery in the universe.

Allow me to say, “well done you,” remember buying a ticket? Got the stub? Nope, it’s a freebie, nothing to do with you or me at all. Just, ‘pop’, have some of that.

The most poverty stricken, abused, tormented and beaten human being in all earths history is one of the luckiest, most exclusive creatures in the known universe, it’s just that ungrateful bastards enjoy the suffering of others while they rape the planet out of an all consuming greed. We could have solved world hunger millennia ago, we haven’t because once people got here they decided to create a hierarchy in which the vast majority lose. That’s what fucking well happened. And not one fucking thing has changed right up till this very day, in fact the earth is in a death seizure because of a tiny microscopic elite who think it is just fine and dandy to rape the world, including you and me. Remember the bank bail out? Yeah, that.

I am sure you will recall Theresa May saying, “There is no magic money tree.” Of course there is and that vile woman knows it, just as every grasping Tory knows it. If I must give it a name, I believe our magic money tree is called Earth, although locally, that would be the bank of England, a sovereign money provider which literally has a licence to print money or just magic the money on a screen, banks do the same when creating Debt via loans. In the words of Captain Picard, they ‘make it so’.

On Friday 17 July at approximately midday I died, thankfully briefly, and was brought back by an amazing team of dedicated staff at the RUH hospital in Bath, UK. Just looking at the odds above, what are the chances of getting a second bite of the most exclusive cherry in the universe, eh? We’re into silly numbers with names like googolplex, although I am not sure that comes with a swimming pool. In short it isn’t worth thinking about without putting kinks in your brain.

Coming back, there are certain crucial changes which have occurred. The immovable wall that was depression is no longer there, I can sense where it was and it’s completely healed. Secondly, I have lived a reclusive life for nearly 30 years. That’s disappeared, I am taking walks round my garden to aid my healing once or twice a day, chatting to my neighbours, and took the couple next door a gift because I omitted to welcome them when they moved into the house I once occupied. A gorgeous couple. I am not fearless, just fear appropriate now I think, probably, I’ll have to take a rain check and wait till it arises. I am reunited with my estranged daughter, who I drifted apart from as I struggled with my life.

Everything has changed in my life, I was in a state of bliss in hospital, having a ball with the staff and loving every moment. I was over the top and there was bugger all I could do about it, I was so happy I could have burst.

Last Sunday when I had my first chemo, apart from an extreme seizure from the chemo in which I could barely breath from the exquisite pain, within half an hour I was back on the drip and in for the long slow safest ride they could give me, of fifteen hours. I had my laptop and listened to Pink Floyd concerts for the duration and had a total blast. I finished with the live show of The Wall which I had never seen and which completely blew my mind. I was released last Monday and have spent the week trying to come to earth and had a mind bending all nighter a couple of days ago. I spent last night communicating with a dear friend (she’s with me on the bench above) who stayed with me all night until I achieved a state of calm and slept and awoke today, home and happy.

I am done with politics, day in day out, they will never change, I don’t need to read the news or find out what their latest bastardy is, how many more people they’ve killed. No, that would be looking entirely the wrong way.

So like Robert Pirsig in Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, I am embarking on a Chautauqua. Here it is in Pirsig’s words: “What is in mind is a sort of Chautauqua…that’s the only name I can think of for it…like the traveling tent-show Chautauquas that used to move across America, this America, the one that we are now in, an old-time series of popular talks intended to edify and entertain, improve the mind and bring culture and enlightenment to the ears and thoughts of the hearer.”

Mine will naturally be different, but I have already embarked on the journey which will probably consume what years I have left to me. It will be a series of dialogues, begun in writing, to examine our lives, our human condition and contribute all I can to changing the national consciousness, in some small or large way, to energise and inspire and encourage people to live in a new wholesome way which will be anathema to the murderers in power about whom I simply do not care. It will grow at its own organic pace, it will mean travelling and meeting others. open mike nights in folk clubs once I get my hand fixed and my new guitar and having a ball. The camp fire is lit, you’ve already seen my first pickings and shared thoughts. My only desire is to inspire. I am back, I am fully human and fully alive, I am irrepressibly happy and my bags are packed for the ride.

Lets’ find out what we can do with living in space age times with stone age minds and do something about it. What say?

KOG. 1 August 202.

Zen And The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance

One thought on “A journey begins

  1. So much to love and for myself a shift or two. This one especially came to me when you wrote about being fear appropriate. My own is about risk ~ I became risk averse because of Covid. Now I am actually risk appropriate. I am unafraid of death (since I was 5 or 6 believe it or not) but when it comes to pain I do rather shy away from that. Death isn’t final, it is only a shift away from this particular body. I am chuffed at having the one I occupy, and feeling so blessed at this life, each day, leading me to the next and filled with happy moments, calm, peace, joy, bliss, and occasionally a stubbed toe/bump in the road…just to remind me when I momentarily forget. I am creating my joyful life. I am loving reading about yours.🌞🌞🌞


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